it's finally that time of the semester,
when I am able to take a mini breather from everything that is happening.
This semester is going to be an extremely tiring and overwhelming one, but I believe that it'll be one of the most fulfilling semesters too.
i have to balance 6 mods, SAC, open day, ce day, ce fest, games reading group and possibly house head nominations in the next few weeks to come.
1. 6 mods: to complete my plan of doing double degree on time (without extending by 1/2 sems), I will need to overload for at least 5 sems (3 if I manage to do GE3230A? the field studies 8MC mod during Y2S2 i guess). So here's my first sem overloading and it's going pretty okay so far, partly because JS is pretty chill, i'm having fun with korean 2, and GER1000 isn't that much of a burden. the remaining 3 heavy mods are hellish though. I didn't expect such tough maths in GE2229 but having taken H2 geog before is definitely giving me an edge over others as its easier for me to grasp the concepts of hurricanes etc since it's just a revision + more in depth for me/ plus daniel is taking it and he excels in maths so we kinda complement each other and WE WILL DO WELL (hopefully hahaha). As for GL2101 and GE2202, I'm guilty of not touching the readings for the entire sem. I read 3/6 readings for GL2101 before lectures but it felt so overwhelming while I was reading as I have zero knowledge about early modern period history in the Atlantic region and felt so so lost. But I managed to cram 200 pages of readings in 3 days to do my midterm paper and I regret not persevering earlier on haha. It's really so interesting to the point I felt like I should have taken pure history / H1 / H2 history but nah geog is interesting too. Looking forward to the remaining few weeks left and now I know I will conquer my readings on time hehe hopefully 20th + 21st century stuff are interesting too. Finally, GE2202 hahahahahha the mod I do not have any friends taking with me, nor have I went for lectures/ read 6 weeks of readings / watched 6 weeks of webcasts LOL. I'm really quite screwed for this mod, but I have started reading it and tutorials are pretty interesting. Thank goodness the prof is really fun and cracks legit jokes unlike some lame profs hahahaha he gives off the fatherly vibes too and I am really glad I went for tutorial even though attendance wasn't compulsory / no class part. Really looking forward to completing this mod's readings too hehe. I guess I'm blessed that I love everything I'm studying now, even though some diversity would be much appreciated (eg. some chemistry / maths to do).
2. SAC: Honestly, I didn't go for a couple of meetings during the first half of the sem as it has been an emotional rollercoaster these few weeks, but things are getting better and I've started attending meetings again. Really love this bunch of people and it's insane how our journey together is coming to an end already, with only INS left during week 9 :( I would really continue on if its the same comm but sadly I don't think that will be the case. But I know I've found my favourite bunch of people outside ROC and I'm really thankful that I didn't get into house comm actually.
3. Open Day, CE Day + CE fest: Week 7 - 9 will be insane with INS, open day training + open day, ce fest training + ce fest and ce day preparation / recce trip / proposal. WHAT HAVE YOU GOTTEN YOURSELF INTO PONG???? WHY AM I DOING SO MANY THINGS? I really hope that I'll be able to cope and maybe, just maybe, I'm signing up for so many stuff to force myself to be disciplined haha. I actually love being busy and know that my time in CAPT is being well spent, maximising the opportunities that I have to grow and develop as a person.
4. Games reading group: We went for a fieldtrip today and I was asked about why I decided to join reading group, since most people who joined are seniors who are taking just to clear their residential stay requirements. Honestly, I just felt like since I'm paying so much to live in CAPT, and I came for the UTown College Program which places more emphasis on education rather than participation in hall/RC activities, I should be making full use of my time, energy and money to make sure my stay in CAPT is as fulfilling as possible. It was something I have interest in, and really I won't make the effort to find out more about this topic that I have interest in if not for this reading group, so why not? Was torn between this and the human trafficking reading group that a global studies prof is in charge of, but I chose this instead as I thought it'll be more fun and I needed something fun to balance out my workload haha.
5. House head nomination: Now comes the biggest burdern/worry on my shoulders now..Whether to run for it or not. The more I think about it the more I want it, and I know the more disappointed I will feel if I do not get the role. It makes sense to run because I love ROC more than CAPT and I really want this place to be a home for the freshies and let them experience what I felt over the past 1.5 sems, a home away from home, to know that you have a shelter to come back to, people who genuinely care about your well-being and will make the effort to make you happy and feel included. I believe that I have also taken part in enough events to manage people and would like to learn how to do so as well. It's also one of the last chances to take on such a high leadership role. But then there's also the fear of failure, what if I don't get the role? After telling myself that I want the role so much, I don't know if I will be able to cope with rejection by the house and failure. I hope that people do not vote for who they like/are close to, but rather who they believe can be capable house heads together, to bring roc to greater heights, and to make roc a home for everyone. I do not believe that the house comm/heads will experience failures, they are just lessons to be learnt so that the next event can be better planned and enjoyed by more people, or provide more entertainment for people since events are a platform for us to interact with others that we do not always see. I would really love to see more people step out of their comfort zones, to make the effort to talk to people whom they are not close with, but still feel comfortable talking to them since we are all part of the same house, sharing the same culture and feeling the same love. And I would want to be in the position to introduce new ideas to improve on our culture and inclusiveness and to actively care for our well-being. After all, roc has given me so much over the past 1.5 sems and it would be an honour to give back and be able to serve the people in this house. Not saying that I will not do it if I am not a house head, but if I'm willing to do that much for roc, why not go for it right? There's still 1.5 weeks more to think about it so I guess I'll take my time and not make rash decisions, although its leaning towards running for it now.
another thing I have to cope with alongside with all these is conflicting and overwhelming emotions. It has really been a crazy 6 weeks since the sem started, having some regrets here and there but I'm glad for everything that has happened and brought me to where I am today.
I sacrificed work for the first few weeks but I got closer to so many people. Tammy, Benn, Zexun, Shubz, Kang Ming, Corn, Cheryl, Lenard and Huiee. LOL just realised they are all on level 5 besides benn and km. But I'm really so thankful for all of y'all for giving me the support that I needed and never knew I could receive. I thought that I had found my support system in roc already, but change is the only constant ya? Thank you all for making my life so much better. I'm really glad that we put each other before ourselves and actively care for one another. Waking the whole level up for 9am breakfast has become our thing and gathering people for lunch / dinner too. Thank you for making everyone feel included and loved. Thank you daniel too, for always being there for me when I'm at my best and (bringing me to) my worst, always pushing me to do better yet knowing what my limits are and telling to me care for myself more and let others treat me better (but bruh you can't follow your own advice for nuts). Thank you for pushing me to try something new, achieving something I never thought I could achieve. Although I didn't get into the road relay ICG team (that won 1st LOL damn sian) because of 3 seconds + didn't go retrial even though the captain offered to do a retrial for me (because i felt it'll be unfair to the other girl LMAO PONG YOU RLLY TOO DUMB 3 WEEKS AGO), running 8:44 for 1.8km is something I never thought I could do, given the numerous health problems that I have lol. Thank you for running with me and pushing me whenever I wanted to give up, even when you have a hole in your heart and shouldn't be over-exerting yourself. Thank you for encouraging me to continue trying despite not getting into the team this year and believing that I can make it next year. You've really raised the bar of being a house head and best friend way too high that I don't think anyone can do better than you lol. Thank you benn, zx and shubhankarrrr too, for always keeping tabs on me everyday and making sure I'm doing alright. Y'all da best <3
Ok time to get my shit together yay CAP 4.25 THIS SEM LEGGO hopefully everything will work out, but even if it doesn't I know I'll just grow more and glad accept it hehe because I'll only grow stronger and better :)
Note to self: Stop trying to save people, save yourself first. You cannot save others, only they can save themselves. Do not confuse pity/sympathy for love. They have to love themselves first, before you love them.
Continue reading recess week
when I am able to take a mini breather from everything that is happening.
This semester is going to be an extremely tiring and overwhelming one, but I believe that it'll be one of the most fulfilling semesters too.
i have to balance 6 mods, SAC, open day, ce day, ce fest, games reading group and possibly house head nominations in the next few weeks to come.
1. 6 mods: to complete my plan of doing double degree on time (without extending by 1/2 sems), I will need to overload for at least 5 sems (3 if I manage to do GE3230A? the field studies 8MC mod during Y2S2 i guess). So here's my first sem overloading and it's going pretty okay so far, partly because JS is pretty chill, i'm having fun with korean 2, and GER1000 isn't that much of a burden. the remaining 3 heavy mods are hellish though. I didn't expect such tough maths in GE2229 but having taken H2 geog before is definitely giving me an edge over others as its easier for me to grasp the concepts of hurricanes etc since it's just a revision + more in depth for me/ plus daniel is taking it and he excels in maths so we kinda complement each other and WE WILL DO WELL (hopefully hahaha). As for GL2101 and GE2202, I'm guilty of not touching the readings for the entire sem. I read 3/6 readings for GL2101 before lectures but it felt so overwhelming while I was reading as I have zero knowledge about early modern period history in the Atlantic region and felt so so lost. But I managed to cram 200 pages of readings in 3 days to do my midterm paper and I regret not persevering earlier on haha. It's really so interesting to the point I felt like I should have taken pure history / H1 / H2 history but nah geog is interesting too. Looking forward to the remaining few weeks left and now I know I will conquer my readings on time hehe hopefully 20th + 21st century stuff are interesting too. Finally, GE2202 hahahahahha the mod I do not have any friends taking with me, nor have I went for lectures/ read 6 weeks of readings / watched 6 weeks of webcasts LOL. I'm really quite screwed for this mod, but I have started reading it and tutorials are pretty interesting. Thank goodness the prof is really fun and cracks legit jokes unlike some lame profs hahahaha he gives off the fatherly vibes too and I am really glad I went for tutorial even though attendance wasn't compulsory / no class part. Really looking forward to completing this mod's readings too hehe. I guess I'm blessed that I love everything I'm studying now, even though some diversity would be much appreciated (eg. some chemistry / maths to do).
2. SAC: Honestly, I didn't go for a couple of meetings during the first half of the sem as it has been an emotional rollercoaster these few weeks, but things are getting better and I've started attending meetings again. Really love this bunch of people and it's insane how our journey together is coming to an end already, with only INS left during week 9 :( I would really continue on if its the same comm but sadly I don't think that will be the case. But I know I've found my favourite bunch of people outside ROC and I'm really thankful that I didn't get into house comm actually.
3. Open Day, CE Day + CE fest: Week 7 - 9 will be insane with INS, open day training + open day, ce fest training + ce fest and ce day preparation / recce trip / proposal. WHAT HAVE YOU GOTTEN YOURSELF INTO PONG???? WHY AM I DOING SO MANY THINGS? I really hope that I'll be able to cope and maybe, just maybe, I'm signing up for so many stuff to force myself to be disciplined haha. I actually love being busy and know that my time in CAPT is being well spent, maximising the opportunities that I have to grow and develop as a person.
4. Games reading group: We went for a fieldtrip today and I was asked about why I decided to join reading group, since most people who joined are seniors who are taking just to clear their residential stay requirements. Honestly, I just felt like since I'm paying so much to live in CAPT, and I came for the UTown College Program which places more emphasis on education rather than participation in hall/RC activities, I should be making full use of my time, energy and money to make sure my stay in CAPT is as fulfilling as possible. It was something I have interest in, and really I won't make the effort to find out more about this topic that I have interest in if not for this reading group, so why not? Was torn between this and the human trafficking reading group that a global studies prof is in charge of, but I chose this instead as I thought it'll be more fun and I needed something fun to balance out my workload haha.
5. House head nomination: Now comes the biggest burdern/worry on my shoulders now..Whether to run for it or not. The more I think about it the more I want it, and I know the more disappointed I will feel if I do not get the role. It makes sense to run because I love ROC more than CAPT and I really want this place to be a home for the freshies and let them experience what I felt over the past 1.5 sems, a home away from home, to know that you have a shelter to come back to, people who genuinely care about your well-being and will make the effort to make you happy and feel included. I believe that I have also taken part in enough events to manage people and would like to learn how to do so as well. It's also one of the last chances to take on such a high leadership role. But then there's also the fear of failure, what if I don't get the role? After telling myself that I want the role so much, I don't know if I will be able to cope with rejection by the house and failure. I hope that people do not vote for who they like/are close to, but rather who they believe can be capable house heads together, to bring roc to greater heights, and to make roc a home for everyone. I do not believe that the house comm/heads will experience failures, they are just lessons to be learnt so that the next event can be better planned and enjoyed by more people, or provide more entertainment for people since events are a platform for us to interact with others that we do not always see. I would really love to see more people step out of their comfort zones, to make the effort to talk to people whom they are not close with, but still feel comfortable talking to them since we are all part of the same house, sharing the same culture and feeling the same love. And I would want to be in the position to introduce new ideas to improve on our culture and inclusiveness and to actively care for our well-being. After all, roc has given me so much over the past 1.5 sems and it would be an honour to give back and be able to serve the people in this house. Not saying that I will not do it if I am not a house head, but if I'm willing to do that much for roc, why not go for it right? There's still 1.5 weeks more to think about it so I guess I'll take my time and not make rash decisions, although its leaning towards running for it now.
another thing I have to cope with alongside with all these is conflicting and overwhelming emotions. It has really been a crazy 6 weeks since the sem started, having some regrets here and there but I'm glad for everything that has happened and brought me to where I am today.
I sacrificed work for the first few weeks but I got closer to so many people. Tammy, Benn, Zexun, Shubz, Kang Ming, Corn, Cheryl, Lenard and Huiee. LOL just realised they are all on level 5 besides benn and km. But I'm really so thankful for all of y'all for giving me the support that I needed and never knew I could receive. I thought that I had found my support system in roc already, but change is the only constant ya? Thank you all for making my life so much better. I'm really glad that we put each other before ourselves and actively care for one another. Waking the whole level up for 9am breakfast has become our thing and gathering people for lunch / dinner too. Thank you for making everyone feel included and loved. Thank you daniel too, for always being there for me when I'm at my best and (bringing me to) my worst, always pushing me to do better yet knowing what my limits are and telling to me care for myself more and let others treat me better (but bruh you can't follow your own advice for nuts). Thank you for pushing me to try something new, achieving something I never thought I could achieve. Although I didn't get into the road relay ICG team (that won 1st LOL damn sian) because of 3 seconds + didn't go retrial even though the captain offered to do a retrial for me (because i felt it'll be unfair to the other girl LMAO PONG YOU RLLY TOO DUMB 3 WEEKS AGO), running 8:44 for 1.8km is something I never thought I could do, given the numerous health problems that I have lol. Thank you for running with me and pushing me whenever I wanted to give up, even when you have a hole in your heart and shouldn't be over-exerting yourself. Thank you for encouraging me to continue trying despite not getting into the team this year and believing that I can make it next year. You've really raised the bar of being a house head and best friend way too high that I don't think anyone can do better than you lol. Thank you benn, zx and shubhankarrrr too, for always keeping tabs on me everyday and making sure I'm doing alright. Y'all da best <3
Ok time to get my shit together yay CAP 4.25 THIS SEM LEGGO hopefully everything will work out, but even if it doesn't I know I'll just grow more and glad accept it hehe because I'll only grow stronger and better :)
Note to self: Stop trying to save people, save yourself first. You cannot save others, only they can save themselves. Do not confuse pity/sympathy for love. They have to love themselves first, before you love them.
